Party Animals!

One day a snake, a turtle and a centipede are having a party.

After two cases of beer are gone, they needed more beer.

So they discuss who's going to go get the beer.

The turtle says, "I will go, you both just wait here."

Two hours later, the turtle wasn't back yet, so the centipede says, “I will go.”

So they open the door and see the turtle is still walking out of the door.

Because turtles walk too slow the centipede says, “You both wait for me to come back, I've got a lot of legs, so I can walk fast.”

The snake and the turtle wait for another two hours.

Finally the snake says, “What is taking the centipede so long?

So they open the door and check, the centipede is still at the front of the door still trying to put on all his shoes.

Finally the snake says, “let me go, I can walk fast, and I don't have feet to put shoes on.”

So the snake leaves.

After three hours, the snake wasn't back yet.

Both of them went to the store to find the snake.

And they saw snake stand there.

The snake says, " Don't give me those dirty looks, it only took me 5 minutes to get to the store, but I am still figuring out how to bring the beer back."

Engela

Top Five Ways to Sharpen Your Sense of Humour

If you want to have more fulfilling relationships you might want to consider sharpening your sense of humour as a great place to start.

1. Cultivate an atmosphere of humour and laughter

Begin to cultivate an atmosphere of humour and laughter in your relationships by focussing on the funny things in life and enjoying the laughter they evoke. Soon you will be seeing humour all over and enjoying it fully.

2. Associate with fun-loving people

If you don't laugh as much as you used to and want to correct the situation start associating with humorous, fun loving people and avoid the kill joys of life.

3. Learn to laugh at yourself

If you don't laugh at yourself other will do it for you. So many people are unable to laugh at themselves because of their own insecurities and fears. They are afraid to look foolish in the eyes of others and appear to be incompetent.

4. Make a habit of collecting jokes

Collect cartoons and jokes and put them on display for all to see and enjoy. Remember, there is plenty of good clean humour to go around. Keep the humour clean.

5. Use humour to neutralize conflict

Learn how to be witty. When things get tense use wit or humour to brighten things up. Humour can let the biggest bully crack a smile or even burst out in laughter.

Glorious Food for U